Priopriety, of course, is not free.
Just like blue chip stock, a new Toyota, or last minute Coldplay tickets, everything in this magical free market has a very specific price depending on how bad we need it.
In the case of Beano, we apparently need to be polite at the price of about 5 cents a meal ($13.29/100 at Costco, use as directed). Raise the price to a dime and there goes the neighborhood (and the atmosphere for that matter).
They don’t have a Beano for burps, but the cost of a burp could be estimated with the price of cucumber seeds. Cucumbers are famous for their burp-potential, so they’ve invented seeds that grow cucumbers that are “burpless”. (both prices come from a company poignantly called “burpee”).
Regular Cucumber Seeds: $2.95
“Burpless” Cucumber Seeds: $3.50 (you can do the math).
Now a sneeze seems like it should be less embarrassing and thus less expensive. But it is more infectious and also uncomfortable for the sneezer. So the $6.90 for 36 pseudoephedrine = less discomfort + less embarrassment.
But wait a minute…
Most sneezes are followed by a parade of blessings from surrounding people! So if you’re a fan of good will or are a person of faith, you might want to attract more of these sneeze-benefits.
So maybe there should be a price on something that makes you sneeze. Snuff powder in the 1800′s could accomplish this for you. Certainly, more people paid to sneeze back then and nobody was paying not to.
At some point in history it became more valuable not to sneeze than to sneeze and the market shifted. And that means that somewhere in time, in the middle of that transition, there must have been a fleeting moment when a sneeze was completely neutral in value.
As, perhaps, it should be…
